I lift my face in faith



I sit on my deck on this beautiful fall morning… and the tears finally come. I’ve been in shock the last 2 days trying to resolve my beliefs regarding a Trump presidency against the reality that we are indeed about to live a Trump presidency. I admit that all along, though I had a twinge of fear, I never for a second believed it would happen. So when I saw friends, acquaintenances and co-workers get behind him I shook  my head in disbelief, but, you know, they were wrong and they would secretly be grateful when he lost. Yes I thought we liberal elitists would save the day, we certainly love nothing better.

WOW! Was I ever wrong! What does that mean to me today on a personal level? How do I accept this reality in a way that is healthy ? I know that part of the process means I must distance myself from all things political that are out of my control and from all things negative as much as possible. And for my sanity, I choose to have faith.

So how do I deal with the issues that immediately affect me and my family? I have a daughter who is insured through Obamacare. I fear for her that she may become uninsured, but I choose to have faith that she will have access to other options. I plan to retire in 2 years and I worry that my resources and money might diminish. I admit, however, that I don’t really understand economics so I choose to have faith that my retirement will be okay.

The last issue is the hardest for me to come to peace with. I have 2 beautiful brown-skinned grandsons and I worry everyday about their safety in a world where the mere color of their skin makes them suspect in the eyes of so many. It is a fact that the Trump candidacy courted and accepted the support of many hate groups, his words brought them out of the woodwork and gave them legitimacy. A friend recently posted that she was not one of “those” people and she resented being placed with them and then went on to explain why she felt justified to vote for Trump. Her sentiments are echoed by many. The problem is that “those” people were part of the package.But this person is a life-long friend. I know her and love her and I also believe her.  There has been far too much hatred unleashed from both sides and we must find a way to move forward.

So what do I do now? Well first as always, I close my eyes and lift my face to the universe. I’m not a religious person but I believe in the infinite good in this world and I choose to have faith. I choose to have faith in the innate goodness of humankind. I choose to have faith in love and kindness. I choose to have faith that we will find a way to come together to fight racism and sexism ( if nothing else that ugliness is in the open and we can’t ignore it if we hope to heal). And, yes, I choose to have faith that now that Trump has used “those” people to help get him elected, he will denounce their hatred and bigotry and find a way to bring all of us together. It will be a process, a struggle, but I choose to have faith.

There is a crack in everything,                                                                                                                     it’s how the light gets in.                                                                                                                               RIP Leonard Cohen

Lift your face, CindyIMG_2698



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